BOX OF ROCKS, TOGETHER AGAIN! Margaret Carlson visited Tucker—and gave him the dope on the press: // link // print // previous // next //
THURSDAY, JANUARY 24, 2008
TOMORROW—PHILOSOPHER FRIDAYS: If we hadnt seen it ourselves, we wouldnt believe it could have happened. But its true! In one short week, Philosopher Fridays has become the most controversial feature anywhere on the Net! Defenders of the current order have e-mailed us their urgent complaints. Tomorrow, well look at what they have said. Next Friday: Our first brush with greatness!
When will our brightest logicians step forward to help a nation which so badly needs them? From their aeries, their defenders complain. Tomorrow, we return to the fight!
CLEARLY, MCCAINS TIME HAS COME: You just know theyll hammer McCain tonight! You know—tonight? At the Republican debate? The debate which will be moderated by Tim Russert and his trophy wife, Brian Williams?
You see, this is the first time in this campaign when either one of these famous Lost Boys has hosted a Republican forum. Up till now, theyve sent Chris Matthew to do such events—and Chris has pandered, smooched and fawned, praising the wonderful Reagan legacy and asking all the GOP hopefuls if theyll amend the constitution to let Saint Arnold seek the White House. Meanwhile, Tim and Brian have taken turns kicking the Dems all over the lot. Indeed, the campaigns first question came from Brian—and it included an instant reference to Harry Reids troubling treason.
Thats the way the debate season started—with Jack Welchs Big Dumb Storebought citing Democratic treason.
And uh-oh! On October 30, Tim and Bri-Bri spent two hours kicking Hillary Clinton around. (Edwards and Obama embarrassed themselves, rushing to take full advantage.) Afterwards, all the pundits rushed to tell us why these two great men had done this; why, we always do this to the front-runner, a long string of big pundits said! And thats good! Because John McCain is now the front-runner. And Tim and Brian will swing into action at tonights big debate.
Of course, back in October, we told you the truth, even as big pundits lied in your faces. In fact, no moderators have ever behaved the way Tim and his better half did that night; no front-runner has ever been mauled the way Clinton was mauled for two hours that evening. In fact, there has never been a presidential debate which even dimly resembled that gang-bang. And tonight, well all get the chance to see that what we told you was right.
Because guess what? Timmy and Brian will not behave the way they behaved on October 30. In fact, nothing they do will dimly resemble the conduct they put forth that evening. Saint John McCain will not be treated the way the Dem front-runner was treated. Nothing will even dimly resemble the event we saw back in the fall.
You see, the pundit corps simply lied in your faces after that stunning October debate—and the whole liberal-Dem world just sat there and took it, as we have done for the past sixteen years. Tim and his trophy wife mauled our front-runner—and our biggest and bravest leaders pretended that they hadnt noticed.
Tonight, Saint McCains treatment will be fair-to-fawning. And guess what, readers? Hes the front-runner! Remember what they told you back then when you see this happen tonight. And remember the way your fiery leaders agree to just sit there and take it.
Also, your brave liberal bloggers.
BOX OF ROCKS, TOGETHER AGAIN: During Campaign 2000, they met each week, matched up on CNNs Inside Politics. They were often dumb as a big box of rocks; well give an example below. And so, the analysts leaned forward, highly expectant, when Margaret Carlson stopped by yesterdays Tucker, together again with her old pundit partner. As youll see, they werent disappointed by the hijinks which ensued.
Yep! Carlson and Carlson, together again, descended to their standard fare. But in the process, Margaret Carlson gave us a valuable look at the current attitude of the insider press corps. What follows here has nothing to do with Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton. Instead, the comments which follow concern the press corps. They give you a framework for understanding the way this campaign has been covered.
Heres what happened when Margaret Carlson was asked about the press corps outlook. Her comments deserve to be pondered:
Much of that is perfectly silly. (Presumably, Tucker also appreciates the fact that Obama wont castrate him—a fear hes expressed several times about Clinton.) But Margaret Carlsons description helps us understand the way the Democratic campaign has been covered. She showed no sign of understanding that her remarks might seem a bit unprofessional—her description of a swooning press corps, or the tone of voice with which she asked Tucker how he feels at Obama events. During Campaign 2000, pundits often spoke unapologetically about their cohorts swoon for McCain. Yesterday, Margaret described another such swoon. You cant help but be taken, she inanely—but revealingly—said.
If you want to understand the shape of the current Dem campaign, well suggest you consider those remarks.
MARGARETS HARD-CORE OBSESSION: Needless to say, Margaret Carlson had been invited on the program to voice the Insider Press Corps views about how vile the Clintons are. Her racial analysis was so sad and inane that we wont stoop to reproduce it (more on this topic tomorrow). But heres a clip from her latest column—a clip which helps us recall the type of nasty sex-obsession which has long driven this cohort:
Anything less than sex under the nose of his daughter! These are truly nasty people—as they were in 1998, as they were for two years after that as they punished Clintons successor, sending George Bush to the White House. The obsession expressed during that campaign have put the dead of Iraq in the ground. But this obsession will never change—their hatreds will only get harder.
Today, they cant help feeling it at Obamas events. And just as in Campaign 2000, it does show up in their coverage.
None of this has much to do with either Clinton or Obama. This is about the insider press—about the way they cover campaigns, including Clinton/Obama.
CARLSON AND CARLSON ON HEALTH CARE, BACK THEN: During Campaign 2000, they met each week, matched up on CNNs Inside Politics. Their resemblance to a box of rocks was clear, even back then. On the afternoon of Gore and Bradleys first debate, for example, they assured their baffled host, Judy Woodruff, that the evenings event would be all about style—that substance just wouldnt matter. They didnt care about anything real, much as Bill Clinton just said.
What would that evenings event be like? It was going to be the debate of the dull and duller, Margaret Carlson said, following up on Tuckers assertion that Bill Bradley is a person who really sort of comes off like hes been smoking a lot of pot Have you seen him? Oh, its unbelievable! (I know, a giggling Margaret Carlson quickly replied.) But Carlson and Carlson felt pretty sure that the dullness that evening would favor Bradley, because Bradley is more comfortable being dull (Margaret). And the idea tonight is to connect with people, and the person who is more comfortable is the one who is going to connect.
To her credit, Woodruff seemed puzzled by these fatuous comments. So youre saying that were not really talking issues here, she asked, in apparent surprise. Its going to be: How are they relaxed? How are they comfortable? And sure enough! Carlson and Carlson quickly agreed that the forum was all about style. Theres no time in these formats to really marshal an argument, Margaret Carlson said. At this point, Tucker Carlson offered a view that surely deserves special Hall of Fame status. His sheer stupidity helps define the shape of the modern press:
Those are the things that really count! After all: According to the palace pool boy, if you want to know what a candidate thinks about health care, you can call the campaign and find out!
What a load off the press corps mind that pronouncement must have been! Journalists were free to talk about style because substance could be gleaned on the phone! And in a truly improbable statement, Carlson said that most people who care about candidates stands probably already know by now. In fact, according to reliable polling, barely half of American adults could even name a White House candidate at the time Carlson made this comment. Simply put, Tucker Carlson was so out of touch he may as well have just phoned in from Mars.
In fact, that nights Gore-Bradley debate was all about substance; several dozen New Hampshire residents asked a string of detailed questions, dealing with a wide array of serious policy matters. Most strikingly, the two hopefuls debated their health care plans, starting a three-month policy dispute the press corps would endlessly bungle. But readers! How did Margaret score the event, three nights later on Capital Gang? Heres a taste of the box-of-rocks style which was already driving your press corps:
The sweaty guy was Gore—and yes, thats what she actually said. By the way, polls had already shown that New Hampshire Dems who watched the debate had scored the event a draw. Carlson said they were finding Bradley more appealing for an obvious reason—at that time, her press corps was pimping hard for Bradley, as they were swooning for Saint John McCain, as they now cant help feeling it when they see Obama.
Margaret never said a word about the two mens health care debate. She did manage to criticize Gore for allegedly trying to be like Bill Clinton—for example, when he got off his chair:
Let us translate: According to Carlson (and a long string of magpies), Gore was trying to seem like Clinton—for example, when he got off his stool to answer citizens questions! (And when he addressed these people by name!) Yes, many others made these scripted remarks. Nowhere can humans be this dumb—except in the insider press corps.
One year later, Margaret Carlson would tell Don Imus why the press was trashing Gore for trivial errors—and ignoring Bushs large lies about policy. It was a matter of fun, entertainment and sport, the vacuous sex-addict said.
TUCKER CARLSON ON HEALTH CARE, RIGHT NOW: They didnt give a fig about health care back then. And they dont give a fig about it now, as Tucker Carlson showed on yesterdays program. How dumb is this guy when it comes to the health care debate? First, he asserted that Clinton has said that she can provide universal health care without added cost. That is flatly untrue, of course—but Hilary Rosen and Bob Franken seemed unable to say so. And then, Tucker offered the comments which follow. Gaze on the soul of the foppish guard which lives inside that palace:
Theyre out of time—and were out of luck. Absurdly, Carlson said there is no country which provides health care more cheaply than we do. Neither Franken nor Rosen challenged this comment—a remark which is box-of-rocks stupid.
By the way, is any press script dumber than this one: This country delivers good medical care. The problem is, in this country, its not delivered to everybody. Jesus God, thats just super-dumb. But every one of them says it!
But then, these people dont care about health care, since they and their families already have it. They care about fun, entertainment and sport—and theyve long cared about hating the Clintons. They pimped for Bradley for that reason—and today, they cant help feeling it when they go to Obamas events. (This is not a comment about Obama. Its a comment about the press corps.)
That said, Margaret Carlson provided a service when she described her cohorts feelings. Just as it was during Campaign 2000, so it is during Campaign 08. They hate the Clintons—and dont care about you. Tomorrow, well look at the way this syndrome has helped shape this years race.